Tarnya Coley Went From Shattered Confidence to Personal Development Coach

My life; my journey. Faced with rejection, low self-esteem, adversity, and near-death experiences, this shattered my confidence. I did not believe in me. I chose to listen to the negatives words that many people would say to me. These negative words would go over and over in my head. I was unsure of how to press stop. I assumed the negative identity other people gave. For years I did not know who I was, this affected my self-esteem. I assumed the identity that other people gave me. I was walking around like an imposer. I had to make a decision that I wasn’t going to believe the lies ANY MORE.


Throughout my life, I have sometimes felt that I wanted to close the door on situations and walk away. Some of my life experiences were too painful, and rejection was the biggest obstacle that prevented me from advancing in my life. I allowed it to overtake my life and it changed my perception of how I viewed people. On reflection, YES, there was the pain. YES, there was hurt. I had to walk through that door and learn how to deal with the anguish. I had to persevere even when things got burdensome. I had to grow through the painful experiences, in order to see victory in my life. I failed at times, but I had to pick myself up, dust myself off and continue the journey. I had two choices. I could have either stayed in my situation and not be much advancement. Or, learn from my failures and move forward to see the transformation in life.


The feeling of rejection is an incredibly painful feeling. My dad rejected me, and I felt that he did not want a relationship with me. I am often asked, is there a happy ending, do you have a relationship with your dad now?  No, he still isn’t in my life. I have accepted that I had to start believing that I was beautifully and wonderfully made. I started to repeat the positive affirmations that my mum would often speak to me.


It all had to start with me believing in me. I had to stop the past from defining who I was, or who I thought I was. I went on a journey of healing and, through that process, I have found my true worth. Life is a beautiful journey. I needed to change my perspective and mindset. I had to change the way I viewed situations. In doing that, only then, I would see positive changes.


I was now walk in my purpose and calling. I am free, free to be me. I started to dream big because dreams do come true. I seek to inspire, motivate, empower and create awareness for individuals to reach their full potential. My passion is to inspire others to dream big and live a life of purpose, on purpose. It is so important to be proud of who you are. Be real and be yourself. Do not let the negative opinions of others to affect you. Be confident in who you are and know your worth.


Having a transformed mindset was the key to moving from shattered confidence to chasing those dreams that were deep down inside of me. We have a tendency to self-sabotage; at times I did not trust my own thoughts. Change does not come easy, but I knew that the chains on my mind had to be unlocked. Research suggests that you can transform your mind through meditation and thereby alter the brain and the periphery in ways that may be beneficial for mental health, and well-being.




I found newfound confidence. I believed in myself and my confidence was boosted. I became self-aware, started taking responsibility for my life and actively deciding on the direction rather than living a mediocre life.  I began to trust in my skills and abilities, knowing that I had something to offer and others would benefit from it.


I started to achieve things that I never thought was possible. I had a teaching career for 15 years. I am now a Personal development coach, motivational speaker, and a best-selling author. My attitude shifted from I can’t to I CAN, this became my daily confession. You have to have a determined attitude, work hard and persevere your dreams despite what life throws at you. An important lesson that I share with clients is to never give up, as quitters never win. I am a firm believer in encouraging clients to be the best version of themselves so they can become everything they set out to be. I desire to help clients to understand the keys to living a pleasant and fulfilled life. Also exhibiting how they can make those small changes so they can have a better quality of life. It is important to believe in yourself because that is where it all starts.


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Tarnya is the bestselling author of Open Doors which is rated ‘an inspirational book’ by many readers. Tarnya is regarded as a respected and influential speaker. She has over 15 years’ experience speaking on many platforms. Mostly gained working in the educational establishment and church arenas. She’s distinguished for her down to earth approach to empowering women and for helping individuals live a life of purpose.

Tarnya is a Personal development coach and dispenses keys to success that work and results in transforming women by making their goals become a reality. She loves inspiring others to dream big.




5 Comments Add yours

  1. Wow! What an inspirational story!
    I also like how effectively you are able to convey your thoughts.
    I wouldn’t wanna miss your future articles so I have decided to follow your blog. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for following the blog. We feature stories from women all over the world as well as business tips and resources.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My pleasure! I would love to read them as well.
        As you have such a wonderful writing, would you mind going through my blog once? I would love to hear from you. Thank you!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. What an empowering post !! Her story feels all too familiar!! Except, getting rejected by a parent seems like one of the hardest obstacles ever! Everyone has a special story to tell, full of overcoming and persevering!! Stories like this let us know the interconnection we all have with one another. At the end of the day pain is pain no matter what. The whole idea of comparing is so irrelevant!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is why we work really hard to share stories of women from all over world. Each story has the potential to educate and empower another person!

      Liked by 1 person

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