I think we can all remember a moment when we just did the most. Either trying to impress others or to prove it to ourselves. This weekend I do believe Teddy Riley had that moment. Oh and the internet went crazy about about it.

It definitely brought up some great discussions and below is one of the discussions. Did Teddy do too much?

Here is what Brittany has to say:

A few nights ago, like many, I was excited to see the music battle of two giants Babyface and Teddy Riley on Instagram. I woke up Saturday morning did my Saturday accountability call, set intention and planned out the rest of the day. We had early dinner plans so I already knew I would be ready for the evening. The battle had already been delayed a week so I had a little more excitement and I just knew it was going to be the highlight of the week.

 

(The original post can be read here When Self Sabotage Shows Up)

 

So like many when it got closer to 9pm I poured a glass of wine and found my favorite spot on the couch. I even tested my equipment to make sure I could project the battle onto the TV. Right before 9pm, I went to make sure my kids were settled because momma and daddy had a date. 9pm rolls around and we are ready and waiting. A little after 9pm Teddy Riley appeared on the screen with a full production team.  The excitement was building. Then we waited for Babyface and by 9:30pm there he was. The battle was beginning and we were about to hear some feel-good music. They played about 3 rounds of music and while I could hear the echoing I was like it’s ok the show must go on. I also thought maybe Teddy’s team would just unhook the extra equipment and keep going. But No instead of doing that Teddy kept stopping and trying to fix the equipment. We all tried to be patient and waited for his team to get it fixed which never happened. Around 10pm Teddy Riley asked everyone to come back in 30 minutes. By then it was over we were tired of waiting and the excitement was gone. The battle we had been waiting all week for ended and for me it appeared to be due to Self Sabotage!

As a therapist and self-proclaimed Self Sabotage Slayer, I started noticing the themes and signs that self-sabotage was apart of this battle as soon as I saw Teddy Riley with a production team. See self-sabotage can be defined as consciously or subconsciously destroying something you have worked for or set as a goal. Self Sabotage shows up in many forms but the most common forms are perfectionism and imposter syndrome. Watching Teddy come on the screen with a full set up I already started to feel uneasy but I thought maybe he did like I did and tested his equipment first. But clearly, that didn’t happen or maybe he did but it didn’t work.

The signs of perfectionism typically are related to the need for things to be bigger than they need to be. Feeling as if you can’t move forwards unless everything is working perfectly. Imposter syndrome tells us that we need more. The more could be equipment, education or experience or in this case lights, drums, and cameras. Either way imposter syndrome shows up and we rarely reach our goals.

See being a perfectionist can be helpful but in small situations that only impact you. Once it starts impacting others that’s when perfectionism is problematic. Teddy’s perfectionism and what appeared to be a need to put on a big show cost us. We were all left without the battle we were waiting patiently for all week.

If you want to learn more about Self Sabotage you can grab my book Get Out of Your Own Way, 21 Days to Stop Self Sabotage you can also follow me on Facebook and Instagram @brittanyajohnsonlmhc

(The original post can be read here When Self Sabotage Shows Up)